Why is it that I can never remember a fat chicks name, but I can remember that hot Spanish girl I hooked up with at off the wagon 3 years ago like it was last night?
I’m not much on giving people advice about anything, but if you’re a single guy, looking to meet women in the city, you should drink as much red bull and vodka as possible. Red bull’s trademark saying “Red bull gives you wings� should be changed to, “Red bull gives you Confidence.� I don’t know what came over me last night, but after polishing off a dozen or so grey goose and red bull (with a few yager bombs mixed in) I had this amazing level of confidence, where I felt compelled to hit on any girl within spitting distance. I think if this news hit the mainstream and it gets marketed correctly, Red Bull will destroy their annual sales earnings. I must have met about 20 – 30 women last night, where I hit all age ranges, waitresses and bartenders, all ethnicities, body types, girls in large groups, small groups, even this one girl who was by herself, approached me and ended up tagging a long for a few hours. They all had one thing in common, they were all really hot or at least I was drunk enough to think they were, so technically, they all qualify as being amazingly attractive.
I was driving home at 10am; laughing about how much fun we had last night and how I managed to amuse everyone (including myself) at my expense. But have to admit, the rejection started to set in and I started to get a little depressed, but I’m usually good with rejection, so I laughed about it. Then it hit me, like an adrenaline rush, I made out with this really hot girl on the upper west side named Moira. I remembered her well, because she was very particular about the spelling of her name and she had an amazing set of tits.
I did well, where last night was not only fun and a great release from my stressful week, I hooked up with this hottie. I am very picky when it comes to looks and she deffinitely passed the test. She was a 23-year-old buxom brunette, with very thick, flowing, long brown hair, confident, bubbly and very outgoing. Perfect! I hit the jackpot and in celebrating my success, I decided that I wanted to setup a really special first date, something she wouldn’t forget, something amazing, like drinks at the Underbar and dinner at the Blue Water Grill. The idea of taking her out was getting my psyched, so I lashed out for my phone and began searching through my phonebook, furiously looking for her number. I couldn’t seem to find it, when I came across a dialed number that I didn’t recognize, it had to be her. I hit send immediately and much to my chagrin, my friend Eddie answers the phone! I must have been silent for a good 10 seconds, then told Ed what just happened as he laughed at me in spite.
If I’ve learned anything from this experience, is that a BlackBerry is fucking impossible to use when you are dialing under the influence. If I had had a normal phone, this story would have ended differently. I’m so disappointed in what could have been. This could have been the one; we could have had an amazing date followed by passionate lovemaking.
It would have been the most intense and erotic 5 minutes of her life!
Today marks the annual celebration of Mardi Gras, as we are 6 months removed from the tragedy that was hurrican Katrina. I spent my 21st birthday in the French Quarter and can say that is was a remarkable experience. I feel for those who reside in NO, who are mostly hourly workers within the hospitality and tourism businesses that depend on this great event. The people in NO were amazing and showed me a great time. With that said, I’m happy to see their resolve in rebuilding the city spirit.