Redbull is awesome!

I feel like my career is taking over my life. I can’t differentiate between my job, personal life or even my dreams. I feel like I’m always handling all three at the same time, all the time. I have fucking dreams that I’m in some corporate boardroom, checking my cell phone to see where my friends will be after work. It’s the same dream every night, but it parallel’s my reality. Freaky.

There’s really nothing that differentiates a salesman at work, at a bar or even on a date, you’ve been associated with the stigma of someone who changes people’s minds for a living.

I’m happy with it – it works. It could be worse, I could be stuck behind a desk all day…..

It takes a strong person to survive the catestrophic events, which I call my weekend, which have become quite costly.

1. Car getting towed - $200
2. New key and transmitter - $175
3. New Sirius Sportster radio - $150
4. New passenger side front tire - $125
5. New rear spoiler - $75

I figured that in facing these fees, I should exhaust every opportunity to start gaining suplimental income to subsidize my losses. I spent 3 hrs online at FullTiltPoker and won $1200 (profit) in a cash game a $2/4 no limit hold em table. This was also after I kicked my friend Ron’s ass on a $20 heads up event, that I won on the first hand no less.

When all else fails in life, play poker online. It’s the best thing since the stock market.

I concluded this weekends affairs with a lovely Italian dinner with my fam. Even though it was my b-day, this was a rare opportunity to gain the attention of my always volatile 22 year old brother.

My bro is the man! He’s grown to be a person with exceptional tolerance, compassion and intelligence. He’s just graduated college and is facing a crossroads in life, trying to figure out what he’s going to do. When I was 19, I was faced with the same challenges/life decisions. Unfotunately, I never had an older brother to seek advice and my father was working 14 hour days, while my mother supported him and kept the family together. Over time, I amassed a cache of mentors, men who I’ve grown to love as older brothers (in a heterosexual way) who went above and beyond in helping through lifes greatest challenges. I don’t know what I would have done without them.

So at this point, I decided that I’m going to do the same for my bro, I mean, I really owe it to him. Don’t get me wrong, we have the most wonderful parents a kid can ask for, however, even they are from the old school and as far as giving advice in surviving the corporate machine, they simply cannot. They want the best for him and they trust that I will do the right thing in protecting him and helping him tap into, what I think, is a tremendous amount of potential and business acumen.

Whenever you advise someone on something so important, you need to really need to think about whether or not you would follow your own advice or else, you’re a hypocrite. Considering the aforementioned, I had to ask myself if I needed to step up and improve my career? And the answer is yes, it’s time to step up. I just finished sending off a letter to my boss in London, asking for a promotion. I really hope it goes through and I can get past these ugly barriers of corporate beauracracy.

Brotherhood is awesome, I can’t wait till this man surpasses me and we can start partying on his dime.

I had fun last night, but I’m not in my normal, post drinking, slap happy mood.

It’s a shame that the fond memories of my 26th will be overshadowed by the last 2 hours of the evening I spent in a police barrack, with a shackle on my ankle attached to the bench I was sitting on.

I’m not upset, angry, regretful or even mad about what happened. But I’m really not in the mood to write about anything funny right now.

No one is more desperate than a drug addict. The lengths these people will go to get their fix is phenomenal. When someone succumbs to a transient lifestyle because of their addiction, it’s amazing to me how manageable their life becomes in feeding their addiction, compared to the mismanagement of their life in general.

In business administration class, we were taught one of the fundamental elements of business, the opportunity cost . An opportunity cost is the value of ones decision, compared the value of the alternative option. When faced with a critical business or life decision, a reasonable person would weigh the value of both options and choose the option with greater value. The alternative is measured as the opportunity cost.

When a crackhead decides to smash someone’s car window and steal their radio, they weigh out the options of being legit and earning money vs. risking their freedom to get high and committing a crime.

In choosing the different vehicles available to getting high, they are faced with 2 options;
1. Working 8 hours, getting paid, then exchanging funds for rocks.
vs.
2. Commit a crime, steal a radio and resell it, which will take less than 8 hours and is hardly considered work at all.

In valuing the situation, the cost will be;

1. Working at an hourly job, expending minimal energy and being bored
vs.
2. Committing a crime, risking ones freedom over the prospect of not having to work

Last night, some crackhead smashed the window of my car and stole my $50 Sirius Starmate radio. This person obviously values not working, vs. earning an honest dollar. The opportunity cost is getting high without the risk of getting pinched.

Here’s the better option;

Working at McDonalds for 1 day, will earn more cash and allow you to smoke more rocks, without exposing yourself to being pinched. In most jails, you will not have access to crack, because you’ll be broke anyway. So in essence, you’ll be better off working at Mickey D’s, vs. the alternative which is sucking dick for crack in jail.

Stop stealing from me bitches!!! Damn!

On March 4th, 2006, I officially turn 26 years old. I’m not one for making a bid deal about my birthday. Like David Cross once said “Why are people suddenly special, just because they are born?�

In my view, it’s a good opportunity to get drunk with good friends. Lately I feel like all my close friends are as busy or even busier than I am, so this will be a good opportunity to gather everyone for a nice session of YB’s and RBV’s.

In addition, my accountant made it clear that I’ve been paying for 80% of the drinks consumed by my inner circle of friends, therefore, I’m planning to spend $0.00 tomorrow on drinking. Break out the ATM cards bitches, it’s time to reciprocate.

FYI – We’ll be at Ulysses tomorrow for those interested.

Today marks the annual celebration of Mardi Gras, as we are 6 months removed from the tragedy that was hurrican Katrina. I spent my 21st birthday in the French Quarter and can say that is was a remarkable experience. I feel for those who reside in NO, who are mostly hourly workers within the hospitality and tourism businesses that depend on this great event. The people in NO were amazing and showed me a great time. With that said, I’m happy to see their resolve in rebuilding the city spirit.

I’m back at work and feel 100% after a long and fun weekend.

I received some bad news this morning, from a good friend, who said that I turned into “Evil Dan” this weekend. I thought I was the life of the party, but apparently, I was quite belligerent, loud and obnoxious. So for all those I offended, I’m really sorry, but it was the booze man.

I will seek treatment for my newly discovered schizophrenia.

I have an important announcement to make; you can now easily access my blog by typing the following URL into your browser http://www.redbullisawesome.com

I met up with a good friend of mine recently, who because of a growing family, I haven’t been able to hang with in a while. I switched from VRB to single malt scotch, which is more of a family style drink than my usual. We partied from about noon till 9pm and I passed out in his guest room after projectile vommitting the wonderful japanese dinner we shared.

There’s no better way to cap a nice weekend of drinking by ridding your body of toxins with a nice puking session. I feel refreshed and am ready to hit the street and kick some ass at work this week.

On another note, I caught the Dave Chappelle interview from Inside the Actors Studio. I think it was probably the best interview I’ve ever seen. You should deffinitely check it out.

Why is it that I can never remember a fat chicks name, but I can remember that hot Spanish girl I hooked up with at off the wagon 3 years ago like it was last night?

I’m not much on giving people advice about anything, but if you’re a single guy, looking to meet women in the city, you should drink as much red bull and vodka as possible. Red bull’s trademark saying “Red bull gives you wings� should be changed to, “Red bull gives you Confidence.� I don’t know what came over me last night, but after polishing off a dozen or so grey goose and red bull (with a few yager bombs mixed in) I had this amazing level of confidence, where I felt compelled to hit on any girl within spitting distance. I think if this news hit the mainstream and it gets marketed correctly, Red Bull will destroy their annual sales earnings. I must have met about 20 – 30 women last night, where I hit all age ranges, waitresses and bartenders, all ethnicities, body types, girls in large groups, small groups, even this one girl who was by herself, approached me and ended up tagging a long for a few hours. They all had one thing in common, they were all really hot or at least I was drunk enough to think they were, so technically, they all qualify as being amazingly attractive.

I was driving home at 10am; laughing about how much fun we had last night and how I managed to amuse everyone (including myself) at my expense. But have to admit, the rejection started to set in and I started to get a little depressed, but I’m usually good with rejection, so I laughed about it. Then it hit me, like an adrenaline rush, I made out with this really hot girl on the upper west side named Moira. I remembered her well, because she was very particular about the spelling of her name and she had an amazing set of tits.

I did well, where last night was not only fun and a great release from my stressful week, I hooked up with this hottie. I am very picky when it comes to looks and she deffinitely passed the test. She was a 23-year-old buxom brunette, with very thick, flowing, long brown hair, confident, bubbly and very outgoing. Perfect! I hit the jackpot and in celebrating my success, I decided that I wanted to setup a really special first date, something she wouldn’t forget, something amazing, like drinks at the Underbar and dinner at the Blue Water Grill. The idea of taking her out was getting my psyched, so I lashed out for my phone and began searching through my phonebook, furiously looking for her number. I couldn’t seem to find it, when I came across a dialed number that I didn’t recognize, it had to be her. I hit send immediately and much to my chagrin, my friend Eddie answers the phone! I must have been silent for a good 10 seconds, then told Ed what just happened as he laughed at me in spite.

If I’ve learned anything from this experience, is that a BlackBerry is fucking impossible to use when you are dialing under the influence. If I had had a normal phone, this story would have ended differently. I’m so disappointed in what could have been. This could have been the one; we could have had an amazing date followed by passionate lovemaking.

It would have been the most intense and erotic 5 minutes of her life!